I realize I’ve missed the deadline on New Rules but unless you’re willing to work for me for free, deal with it!

New Rule – Stop dumping shit in the Sunwell

Ffs I’m not coming into Stormwind and pissing in your canals am I? Er, not counting that summer whe… ok bad example. I’m definitely not marching into Shattrath and shoving random junk up a Naaru’s ass and come on, I’d be totally justified in doing that!

See, I have a modicum of respect for other community’s sacred relics. You have moonwells? Cool. Uther’s tomb? Co.. shit another bad example.

Look, just keep your swords and your legendary axes from Icecrown circa 3.3 and your vials and your bones of dead necromancers to yourselves and keep them the hell out of my Sunwell.

THE PRECEDING CONTAINED SPOILERS AND SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN READ IF YOU’RE NOT INTO THAT.

New Rule – Bring back the old Sylvanas voice

I know you changed her voice and I’m not happy about it. I haven’t been happy about it for a while. I tried to ignore it but now that you’re going to make us spend all this time together, make her sound right dammit!

New Rule – If you open a store, have more than two products to sell

I’m not very interested in non-combat pets at all, never have been. In fact, back when they took up bag space I destroyed my Mojo from Zul’Aman after being frustrated by the lack of space in my bank. Now that you can learn pets and have them not take up space I… still don’t regret deleting Mojo. I really don’t care that much.

Come on though. You went to the trouble of opening up a whole store just for non-combat pets. You have a designated page on your site for this store. You advertised it as exciting new and shiny. You know that truckloads of people love non-combat pets and would line up to fill your pockets with their coin for some new ones.

And you rolled out this new store stocked with only two products?

New Rule – If you’re a blue, you’re irrelevant

No, I’m not talking about blues in the ‘official blizzard employee’ sense. I mean the blue dragonflight. You’re just going to have to learn to grapple with the fact that you were marginalized and made irrelevant even before Naxxramas was in this expansion. Sad? Yes, absolutely but ultimately not my problem.

So take your representative out of the Wyrmrest Temple and… wtf is that Kalecgos?

Wtf?

You got killed in Burning Crusade, I was there, I saw it!

Wait, did he die? Crap, this is what happens when you get disgusted and purge your memory of the storylines that pissed you off including anything to do with the blood elves, Kael’thas and the Sunwell.

Which brings me back to where we started.

Stay the eff out of the Sunwell.